UGH. Uni starts on Monday! Not again, don’t make meeee 😦
I have been studying now for 6 years! and let me tell you, I am so past my overdue date I am starting to smell funny.
Uni is the weirdest place I’ve ever been. Especially starting my Masters. I have met people like minded to me, and I have met many, many people who are absolutely so sure of themselves and what they want to do with life that it just baffles me.
6 years ago, in year 12 I made a decision to go to uni. I had absolutely no idea what I wanted. The only thing I enjoyed at school was Italian, cooking and at times, English. How could I incorporate these 3 things into a university degree? I couldn’t, sadly.
I applied for B of Arts.. ahhh the road to many other degrees. I spent 2 years learning French, sociology, linguistics and psychology. I decided in my second year that yeah, psych seemed alright. That was until I actually took a psych class… and realised you needed a Distinction average to get anywhere in the field basically.
In a nutshell – Not for me.
I did seem to enjoy linguistics and loved kids, so I looked into a future that could encompass the two without giving me the crappy pay that comes with being a teacher or child care worker. (NOT that I agree with that at all, it’s just the fact of the matter. They do such great work, and get paid so little for it).
Speech Pathology was the shining light at the end of the tunnel. That was, until I began to see the cracks and peels. I did 2 more years in a Bachelor of Speech and Hearing Sciences which I somehow scraped by without failing anything – even stats?! Cray.
Anyway at the end of those two very confusing years where so much happened in my life, I was a bit confused again. The natural path was to apply to masters and finish this never ending degree and be a speech pathologist and bloody love it to bits. But, it wasn’t that simple. I applied, yes. My Uni didn’t accept me. They accept about 30 a year, from everywhere.. See, there are only 3 unis in NSW that have speech pathology as a qualified degree.. and it is absolutely competitive.
I ended up finally finding my path to TESOL which I was really excited about eventually. Sure, it wasn’t speech pathology but everything happens for a reason right?! I got into my 6 month diploma, and was planning on working full time for 6 months. I was excited by this too because I so desperately needed to make some savings… I was told.
About 2 weeks before uni was to start in 2014, I got a late offer to Sydney Uni for Masters in Speech Path 2 years full time. OH boy, I was over the moon. But I was so naive. This was going to be the hardest 2 years of my educational life.
I first made friends with the international students who did NOT get my jokes and were also not interested in chatting about the things that interested me – fashion, food and fellas.
Eventually (thank god) I found the 3 people that would make this year bearable.
I failed subjects, I cried once a week, I gained more kgs than ever before, I cried some more about the kgs, I ate my weight in chocolate and chicken so often and I hardly did a reading. I understand at times, why I would have failed some subjects, but it is never the places you deserve to fail is it. It’s always the one that stuffs up your entire year and flow of the subjects and makes you look like a complete dumbass to the entire faculty when you try to appeal it and end up crying and not saying the speech you prepped for like 2 hours and practiced with your boyfriend but instead just sob into a tissue saying ‘”t’s not fairrrrrr!” (GET YO SHIT TOGETHER WOMAN!)
I still think it wasn’t fair…
BUT
It hurt me and pushed me a lot.
And I can say I am stronger for it. As lame as that is.
Funny thing is, I honestly would cry at least once a week to my boyfriend and tell him I hated this degree, but one of my teachers reviews of my performance said that I appeared very calm, and even calmed her down! Well, in that case, perhaps my 12 year old dream of acting shall be back in action after this degree wraps up… JKS that is too much work and pressure to be skinny.. no thanks. If I wana gain 5 kgs I want to be able to complain about it in private… whilst eating more chips.
Anyway – this year is about to begin. 2nd year masters. I am scared. Noone quite understands unless they have completed Postgraduate study… It is hell. You have this weird group of people that you see everyday and you’ve seen them cry in the hallway and you kinda know them but you kinda hate them because they love this degree so much and you are so unsure of everything – but! It’s only one more year.
And if I change my mind… I have no list of other career paths so if anyone knows any fun careers where I can make a decent salary to support my shoe habit then shoot em my way kids.
Basically a post just about how stressed Uni makes me. Sorry. Kinda unimportant I guess…
Whatevs.
elizabethelrose.
elizabethelrose 